I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
