so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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