On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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