IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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