Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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