And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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