I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Randomize
