i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
