No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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