you win again, gameday.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Randomize