it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I had to cum in my sink.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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