Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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