I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
