Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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