She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
its not stalking. its research.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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