She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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