Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
