Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
