I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
