it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
