ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
