why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
