Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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