how can u be prego again
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize