I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
