i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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