I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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