it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
