what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
