This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Randomize