When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Randomize
