remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Randomize
