he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize