Are we in a gay sports bar?
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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