Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
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