Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
