I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize