Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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