god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize