He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
