Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
