pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
