You really coming over, don't trick.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
