If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
