Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
