No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize