i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
