3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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