they need to just BURY HIM!
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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