i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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