I just pynch a tree in the face
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
